12:00 mid

I am in bed. No late night tonight. Actually, I was just down visiting Annelies. We drank some wine, Matilde came by, they danced. Matilde told me I should look for work at a U.S. Army base near Cádiz. Elisabeth came by. I talked to Annelies' sister, Helene, on the phone, Annelies and I danced salsa, read a little of her Taoist book. I'd like to read more about Taoism. And Buddhism. I feel good about my life. María José came over for a English lesson. She'll ask around for potential students for me. I feel my spirit is being killed at work. I really hate it. I feel so worthless. Just 2 more weeks to hang on. If no money comes tomorrow, I'll have to withdraw from my credit card. I slept 3 hours this afternoon. I was so tired! I am pretty lucky. Good friends. Good life. Don't think so much...


10:20 am

You know, I've been reading this book, "Out of the Classroom Closet." Hmmm. Maybe I should go into educational consulting on gay/lesbian issues. There I go thinking again! So many caminos to choose from. I need to get away from video for awhile. I forgot to mention that in Puerto Banus the other night, I saw a guy with a Michigan State shirt, so I went over to say hi. He was from Italy. Didn't speak English. Had bought the shirt -- in Italy -- because he liked it. So much for meeting fellow Spartans here!

6:00 pm

I don't know if I've ever been so angry. But I'm tranquilo now. I didn't get paid again. I was supposed to get money -- $200 -- from a wedding I finished editing Monday. So I had to withdraw $200 from my VISA account. And Herbert was going to have Paco tape the wedding tomorrow, but couldn't reach him, so I have to do it. I told him it should have been arranged before today, but he had excuses about the phone not working.... such bullshit. Just hanging on until Sept. 15th. He said they discussed a contract for me last night. Yeah, yeah. Whatever. I'll play along for another 2 weeks. Assholes! I got another letter from Neil. Quick! Only took 6 days from San Francisco. He's so upbeat about life. Me too!


10:50 pm

Stoned again on a Friday night. I've been writing letters to Neil, Suzanne and Matt. Really enjoying it, too! But I do need (okay, I was going to write "...to go out tonight in an hour," and I thought what time is it? But it's only 11:00, not 12:00.) I still need to eat something and take a shower, though.