11:50 pm

Oh, there's so much to write about. From the heavy play of Motown music -- and English-language music in general -- on Portuguese radio to the "night life" of Évora. We saw the most beautiful "Palacio" in Sintra. Palacio de las Penas. It was still decorated in the manner of 100 years ago when the Portuguese royalty resided there. Absolutely stunning. Probably the best castle/church tour I've ever been on. And Nazaré this morning was stunning. The old town on the cliff overlooking the mighty Atlantic and the beaches below. Oh, I'd love to live there! But winters must be fierce! And this evening I read a bit about Michigan, even southern Oakland County, and their importance in the presidential race in the International Herald Tribune.

So back to the music. Tracy Chapman, Peter Gabriel, Sinead O'Connor, and not their current singles, but other stuff off either new or old albums. What a nice diversity. Portugal is different from Spain in that respect. Old Ike and Tina Turner, Four Tops, Ray Charles, Smokey Robinson, James Brown. Really! And through it all, some magnificent scenes. Old women carrying baskets on their heads -- dressed in black or perhaps several layers of petticoats. Thick shawls to protect them from the biting Atlantic wind. People "walking their cows" down the main road. Magical stuff. So different from where I'll be one week from now. We finally had some decent weather today. From the Palacio in Sintra you can see Lisboa and the Atlantic. Tomorrow, we explore Évora and make the journey homeward. I must admit that I'm ready, although I thoroughly enjoyed today. Through it all, I keep daydreaming of being back in Detroit (with it's 39° high -- yuk!) Let's just plug along, day by day, and see what develops!

11:00 pm

We're in Nazaré, Portugal. It's a very touristy village on the Atlantic. But, of course, at this time of year it's a pretty sleepy town. We're staying in a home. I feel so funny doing that. We bargained the lady down from 5000 to 3000 escudos. Unintentionally. But anyway, I hope the weather is better tomorrow so we can enjoy it. It must be beautiful. I love the waves crashing in. Makes me think I should run a bed and breakfast on the California coast. It rained all day today. I hated it. We walked around Porto in the morning, but I really didn't enjoy it. We took a tour of the Sandeman Port warehouse which was pretty fun. I think Porto would be beautiful in nice weather. I have to admit, though, I'm ready to go home. Home to Málaga. Even home to Detroit. For a while. Frank asks me every day, "What do you think today? Are you coming back to Málaga in January?" I tell him I honestly don't know. And I honestly don't know! We'll see what happens in the next two months.

8:00 pm

My emotions change with the weather. Hell, my future changes with the weather! When it's nice, I think, "How can I leave Málaga?" and when it's shitty, I think, "Why bother?" I'm in Porto with shitty weather. We drove here from Lisbon hoping it would be better, but it's not. It's also a very frustrating city to drive in. There are very few traffic lights. Just kind of a free for all with cars and pedestrians. And, of course, the streets aren't identified. Not that we could make out the names on the map we got from the tourist office. All in all, not worth the trip north. We're thinking of possibly returning Saturday, due to low funds. That would be fine by me.

I really haven't been leaning in any direction regarding the future. I have been fantasizing about winning the lottery and/or falling in love. Actually, I'm seriously considering pursuing a teaching certificate so I can teach in an overseas school. It'd be better money than just teaching English. And I have to think of things like insurance. So maybe I'll stay in Detroit to take classes. God, who knows? I've also been fretting about living and transportation arrangements. Buy a car? Pretty stupid if I'm staying only 2 months. Same with renting an apartment. But I don't want to be dependent on people either. In some ways life is harder in Málaga, in other ways it's so much easier. The freedom would be awfully hard to give up. The rigidity of the U.S. I don't know if I'm ready to go back to that. But the bourgeois, rather than bohemian, lifestyle has it's appeal. I just want it all. Is that too much to ask for?


9:15 pm

So I've come down to my last week in Spain. Spain! I still can't believe I've been in Spain for the past 9 months! And I can't believe all the wonderful friendships I've developed here. From the very start with Dave and Gitta, through Andre, Steffi, Jeannet, Gitta, Barbara, Frank, Annelies, Alton, Joel, Elisabeth. There are so many people who've touched my life. Wonderful friends. It's truly been a dream come true! But it's not a dream! It's reality. I can make what I want of my life. I just have to decide what it is that I want! Sunshine and warmth. Good friends. Security of money. That's all!

6:30 pm

Frank and I are in Lisbon. His other friends didn't come after all. I really like Lisbon. The activity is a nice change from the tranquility of the past two nights -- in Faro and Sines. It's a very cosmopolitan city. I must say there are a lot of people on the streets asking for money. I just wrote a postcard to Bob. I wish we could've come here together. Frank is getting on my nerves. He's so hyper. And he never wants to make any decisions. And he's sick. And he always wants to rest or eat. Oh well, enough bitching. Oh yeah, I'm spending too much money, too! I normally eat very little while traveling. I don't feel as energized as I usually do when I travel. Something's missing. Ah yes. Freedom.

6:50 pm

I found the Mesquita in Córdoba absolutely breathtaking! I'd have to rank at the top of the list of Spanish sights. The mixture of Moorish and Christian temples makes it so unique. I had outstanding weather today, too. I was able to walk around quite a bit. The city isn't quite as nice as Sevilla, but it's pretty nice. Now I'm waiting at the train station -- with a headache. Maybe I'll need to just stay in tomorrow to gear up for Portugal.... Nah! I should call Joel and see if he wants to buy my bike. Or play tennis. Or go to bed with me. Oops! Slipped! So I'm leaving in two weeks -- but I'll be traveling for half that time. Shit. I'm really starting to feel melancholy. Elisabeth's departure got me thinking a lot about my immanent departure. There will be so much to look forward to -- although I noticed there was snow in Battle Creek on the news. I'm not ready for that!

11:15 am

I had a nice time in Granada -- at least in the morning when the weather was nice. I went to the Alhambra and went through it with an American man I met there. He was a bit annoying, taking pictures and videos all the time, but it was nice to have someone to talk to. Then it rained and rained and I couldn't do a lot of walking around the town. I plan to go to Córdoba tomorrow and then Frank and I go to Portugal on Saturday for a week. Annelies hurt her leg and won't be able to join us. I'll miss her! I don't know if I'll enjoy Frank for a week. I do need to take advantage of the travel opportunity, however. Elisabeth leaves today. The "family" is breaking up.

11:00 am

So! That was a nice Wednesday evening of thinking and writing I had there! I needed it. Today I'm going to Ronda and the lake and forest area around there with Annelies and Frank. We'll stay overnight. Should be fun -- traveling. We're also talking about going to Morocco at the end of October for a week. Great! We'll go to Marrakech and the south -- by car. Much better than the train. Last night I went to the Feria de Fuengirola with Beth and family. It was a nice change of pace. Went on the roller coaster with the kids. I was going to go out to Bolivia afterwards, but Annelies was coming back, sobbing, as I was leaving. So I stayed and talked to her instead. She's feeling an "autumnal depression," but I think relationship problems have something to do with it. I suppose it's good to just cry sometimes. I'm sure I'll cry when it hits that I'm leaving. I've decided to leave work the 15th so I can travel. And "think." So, with Monday a holiday, that's really only 3 more days of work! De moved in next door. We had a nice chat over breakfast. Too bad she wasn't there before. It's a nice day today, after the past few days being very cold and rainy. I've been daydreaming of buying a car, packing up my things and heading across the USA in January. Current plan, anyway.


11:30 pm

Where am I? In Ubrique with Frank and Annelies. We're having a good time -- although it took us 2 hours and 3 towns to find lodging. We went out tonight. Not much action here. And no restaurants! Plus, it's the eve of hunting season, so the locals are hyped. I do like the idea of bringing kids -- whole families -- to the bar. They really give special attention to the kids here. We're in a cute little pensión -- only $10 a night. God, I'd love to run a bed and breakfast. I really need to look into that! I feel pretty comfortable speaking Spanish with Annelies and Frank, too. Maybe I should return here in January! ¿Quién sabe? Matt and Eli should come here on their honeymoon. Lots of leather for sale, too.

1:30 pm

The long journey is nearing its end. We're on the bus to Málaga. Of course, I'm supposed to be at work right now. Oh well. Sure enough, we had to spend the night in Tangier. And we had to find a place that took credit cards since we didn't have any dirhams. But it worked out okay. The ferry back to Spain was nice. Much better weather this time. I didn't realize how close the two continents were. Beautiful scenery. This rolling countryside in Cádiz province is nice, too. On the train yesterday, we met two more Moroccans. One lives in Fes, has studied in London and gave us his address so we can stay with him in Fes. Really friendly people here! The other was friendly, too. He invited us to spend last night at his house in a small town. We said we had to get to Tangier. Just before he left, he asked if we wanted some hashish! I was tempted... Good thing David's here. On my own, I'd probably fall for so many tricks. Naiveté. Oh well. Next time I'd rather go by car. Much more freedom with the time, plus you'd avoid a lot of the hustlers. Maybe I could get Joel to go. His French would certainly help. You know, more than one Moroccan said something about "the more you give, the more you receive" in life. I like that. Alms-giving is one of the 5 tenants of Islam. I guess that's why they're so hospitable. Youssef mentioned that when you die, you don't take anything with you, so why accumulate a lot of things. He prefers to travel. Me too!


3:00 pm

Ay! Just when it seemed we were home-free. We just passed through Marbella when the air-conditioning on the bus went out. Now we're stopped by the side of the road. To fix it? ¿Quién sabe? ¡Qué calor! This is getting to be too much. I guess I'll never get to work today!

2:00 pm

I'm not really in the mood to write, but I don't have much else to do. We're in the train station waiting to go to Tangier. We were supposed to leave at 7:30 this morning, but the alarm didn't go off! Shit. What a waste. And now we don't know if we can make the last ferry to Algecieras. It would be a drag staying in Tangier again. With the hustlers. I hate wasting time. And I might have to miss work tomorrow. Too bad!

7:10 pm

Woof! What a couple of days! I can't believe I have friends in Fes! We found out that, yes, Abdul is a hustler. But a benevolent hustler. He's lied to us -- quite a bit actually -- but the end result is that everyone's happy. That's the rhythm of life in Morocco! He took us to his home on the edge of the medina. It was incredible, the squalor we passed through. Kids playing in the narrow, garbage-filled alleys, saying, "Bonjour" when they saw us. We had traditional Moroccan tajine and mint tea. It was fantastic! Then he mentioned he was going to take a walk through the medina. Oh, we would like to come with him? Sure, why not? He's so slick! We wandered through the incredible maze of the medina, stopping occasionally to look at a leather tannery, carpet maker, etc. It was so delicious just soaking up all the sights, smells and sounds. Then we ended up at a carpet store that Abdul "had never been to before." In fact, he told us several times. When the big sales pitch came -- after some mint tea -- we knew we had been scammed. In fact, David found it perfectly spelled out in his guide book. "A man will meet you several stops before your destination, invite you to tea in his home, take you to the medina, and then to the shop "of a friend." Pretty much says it all. Anyway, David got into the bargaining -- arguing that he didn't want to buy until his (fictitious) girlfriend could come back to see the carpets. Total scamming on all sides! But the end result was that David got a good deal on a carpet, the owners made a profit, and Abdul got a commission to be sure. I got a fascinating experience! I was rather put off at first when I found out it was a scam and they started applying pressure, while saying, "You don't have to buy. We're friends!" and other assorted bullshit. But then I got to enjoying it for the game that it was. Really. That's all it is! And (usually) everyone wins! This morning David and I wandered the "new Fes" area of the medina and had to fend off some pretty persistent "guides." They were very annoying. But again, part of the game. We managed to find our way around pretty well on our own. But then Abdul met us again at 2:30 pm and we went back to Fes-al-Bali -- old Fes, dating from the 9th century. We stopped for mint tea at a tiny cafe full of old Moroccan men playing cards -- while Abdul excused himself "to go to the toilet." He kept disappearing on us all the time. No doubt making other arrangements for us to go somewhere "he's never been." We went to buy some tea services at a really nice place. The shopkeeper was very friendly. David was trying to speak Spanish with him most of the time. I managed to get a brass tea service (for Matt and Eli) and an extra teapot (for me!) from about $200 to $60. Not bad. Then we went to buy camel hair blankets. $30 -- good deal. The salesman there, Youssif, said he has a friend in Málaga (the director of the school where Carmen from yoga class teaches!) and he'll come visit me. He also said I could stay with him next time I come to Fes! Jenny and I have to come back! So it's been quite an exhausting and exciting 2 days in Fes. I hope to keep in touch with Abdul even though he's a scammer. But it is a win-win-win situation! The Moroccan people really are a hospitable people. If you can look past the hustling. It really seems to be part of the culture. You have to accept it a you would accept any cultural differences. Oh, we even had three young guys apparently try to "hustle" us in the sexual sense. They had their arms around us, commented on our bodies, etc. Pretty wild stuff here!!


9:00 pm

So we said good-bye to Abdul. He came over to have dinner with us and even paid for it. What a nice guy. What a contradictory country this is. You lie to people, then take them to dinner. Wait a minute. Isn't that similar to what happens in U.S. business? There's an eye-opener! Maybe it's just on a different scale with different stakes. We even ran into him again after dinner while looking for a Visa money machine. He offered to give us dirhams in exchange for pesetas. What a good guy! I hope he got a good commission off us! That brings up the question of whether or not he knows that we know. When/if I come back, couldn't we just be open about him getting a commission? Or do things need to remain covert. Hush, hush. Some things we just don't talk about!

11:30 am

Pretty exciting stuff! We're traveling from Tangier to Fes. On the "first leg" we met a young man who spoke English and was very friendly. He told us, among other things, that Fes is very dangerous right now, and we should get off the train with him and wait for the connection to Fes. Well, we almost did, but David asked an employee and we figured out we were supposed to change trains later. He was talking about going to a "market" 5 km from the station. Hooboy. We could've really had some trouble. But he was so nice... Anyway, then we met some people where we sat next. The man, Mohammed, spoke some French and that's how we communicated! There were also two girls, Hend and Rafa, who were very nice. They were all going to "Casa" -- Casablanca. We listened to Arabic music on a pink portable tape player. And we managed to talk about a few things. Found out we were all single. Mohammed suggested that I marry Rafa! They said they'd tell us when we had to change trains, so that relieved us. We had a visit from 2 little girls who Mohammed apparently knew. It was really fun!! A great cross-cultural experience, albeit frustrating with the language. We took photos and said we'd send them to them. Then we met Abdul, a teacher who speaks English. He lives in Fes and invited us to his house. I think we'll check into a hotel first, and then we could do it without fear. I'm enjoying learning.

3:00 pm

Geez!! So, 24 hours later, I'm on a ferry to Tangier. But I shouldn't have gone out so late last night! I had planned to go for a drink at Bolivia and be in bed by 1:00 am to get some sleep before waking at 5:30 am. But Joel stopped by and told me about the party at Carambuco that I had promised to help with. Actually, I thought it was tonight. But anyway, I allowed myself to get dragged out -- until 4:00 am. And, of course, since the sangria was free, I drank a lot. Now I feel like I did on the Press Boat in Lake Huron after Boat Night in 1987. I didn't even have fun last night. None of my friends came with me. So I was bored there -- and trapped since it's so far away. I finally paid $10.00 to catch a cab at 4:00. Uf. Bad evening. I've had only 7 hours of sleep the past two nights. And Morocco is next! I had meant to call Jenny and Donna last night, but totally forgot.

11:17 pm

It's been a pretty exhausting day. And I'm sure that tomorrow will be, too. First, it was pouring down rain when we arrived in Tangiers. Of course, we were greeted by the standard hustler "guides." David tried the "be friendly but firm" approach when one leeched on to us. I pretty much tried to ignore him. But he wouldn't leave us despite our protestations and promises of no money. After walking a while in the rain, we made it very clear that he had to leave us and he got rather belligerent -- almost violent. In fact, he said, "I'll kill you" at one point. And he had some "friends" rush to his support later on. It was a bit unnerving but we finally got rid of him after he spent 5 minutes calling us names and jabbing us with his finger, demanding to be paid for "showing us the way." David was pretty shaken. I thought it was a great experience! We certainly learned a lot. We never should have let him follow us in the first place. But we found a hotel, dried out for a bit, then went out for dinner and walked around the market area. The sights and sounds, although soggy, were fascinating! We were latched onto a couple more times, but pretty much ignoring them seemed to do the trick. Tomorrow should be fantastic!

3:00 pm

I WIN AGAIN! I WIN AGAIN! I WIN AGAIN! Man, things are looking good. Just got to work out the details. BHSD wants me to come back to work for 6 weeks at $100/day. That puts me there through Christmas. I hope that sounds okay to TVP. I could come back here in January. I just hope they don't decide they don't need me in the meantime. If so, I'll have to find another job. I can do it! And the extra $3000 will come in handy. Okay, it'll be less with taxes, but it'll pay for my plane, Christmas gifts and living expenses for the two months there. Perfect! So then, I'll probably still work until I leave Nov. 5th. That means Jenny and I may not be able to travel. And I wouldn't be here if Matt and Elizabeth come. But then again -- I might go to Morocco tomorrow! I don't have to work again until Wednesday. Herbert's been giving me everything I've asked for lately. Okay, time off, but not more money. I'll ask David if he wants to go. It'd be cool! I wasn't sure I could do it because of the money, but now it shouldn't be a problem.

And I had a great time at Expo yesterday. A long day -- from 6 am to 4 am. And I couldn't go to many pavilions I wanted to because there were incredible lines. But I went to some smaller ones and enjoyed them. Latin America, South Pacific Islands, Holland, Poland, Cuba. I traveled around the world. And heard music from Jordan, Venezuela, Germany. great stuff. I even figured out the transportation situation. Bike, train, metro, bus. I love the freedom of traveling!

3:15 pm

So I've been bummed because I haven't had any mail lately. But I got a visitor instead! David's a friend of Jane and Jon's. Annelies told me of a guy who came to her door yesterday asking about me. Said he was a friend of Jane's visiting here. How fun! It was one of those cool spontaneous things. David and I rode bikes to Annelies's yoga class, but got lost, so we went for a beer instead. Then we met up with people from the class afterwards. Went to a small, funky restaurant for a bite to eat, then to Plaza de la Merced for another drink. I really like the Spanish couple from class. Very nice. Tomorrow, I'm going to the Expo! Things are slow at work, so it's a perfect time. Frank has Thursdays off, so maybe he'll go with me -- and drive. I'd rather spend the day alone going through the pavilions I want to at my own pace. But we'll see. I'd like to stay late, too. I may go to Morocco with David. Yeah, I know I'm not supposed to spend money! But I need to travel. I can't wait for Jenny.

5:40 pm

Boing. Down again. And I had even been mildly up yesterday. Didn't have to work in the afternoon, so I went to Torreblanca. Went to the beach -- the water is so clean there, and the beach is less crowded. Even managed to scope out a couple of guys. Then I visited Dave and Gitta in Torreblanca. It was busy and very hot, but nice. I met this guy, John, who works props for films here in Spain. We had a nice talk about politics and music and such. I need friends like that. God, I should move down the coast. I think I'd be happier. After running to catch the last train -- like always -- I ended up back home at 12:30 am and I showered and ate. Then Annelies came by for a visit. I was 1 1/2 hour late meeting Gitta at Bolivia, but we sat and talked and talked. Then we went to Donde and danced and danced. I'm so glad I wore my shorts! I guess I was pretty drunk by the time I got home at 4:00 am.

I almost didn't make it into work today, but I managed. But that's when it started. God, I hate my job. I want something where I don't have to think! And it's so damn hot! So I started thinking again about quitting and finding something else. (Sounds easy!) And thinking about Bob. The part that got me really down was when he said he's been dating a few guys. I really didn't need to hear that right now. It really sent my emotions into a tailspin. Once again, I wonder what the hell I'm doing here. Unstable emotions. You know, I've been thinking -- again -- of writing Dad's story. Or Maude's story. I told Gitta the story of Maude and my travels last night. Got me excited again about that. About travel. About feeling alive!!

10:30 pm

I am fighting hard to stay awake right now. I can't believe how tired I am. But Annelies is washing the floor and I have to wait for it to dry, of course. Shit. It's probably best to stay up, though. Get my body adjusted. I managed all right getting here from the airport. Mitchell wasn't there. In fact, I still haven't gotten ahold of him. I don't especially want to go to his party tomorrow anyway. But I should. Maybe Annelies will go with me. Anyway, I took a taxi to the bottom of the hill where I live and then leapfrogged my baggage up the slope. I looked at a studio apartment available here. It's so small, but it's only $230/month. We'll see. I just want to get settled. And I could stay there for 3 months and then move if Bob, Jenny or Alyssa come. I rode my bike down the beach today. I loved it. Yes, it was worth the hassle!

5:00 pm

I can't believe it's over already. I barely got a chance to write in my journal. I hate that. So much has happened. It's been a fantastic 2 weeks. We had a great party at Karen and Rick's last weekend. Played and played. So much fun. I forgot about how much fun my friends and I have when we're together. I miss them! Everyone was so great to me. I borrowed Barb's and Jane's cars, stayed at Matt & Eli's and Karen & Rick's. They spent so much money on me! Patrick had people over for a barbecue. I really am lucky! And I'm not ready to go back yet. I'm trying my best to get excited about it. But I must admit that I really love this country! The conveniences! Fast food. Shopping. Cars. Television. The easy life. So difficult to walk (or fly) away from. I'm in Chicago now. Waiting. We've been sitting in the plane for 2 1/2 hours, waiting out a storm, and now the long lines of planes ahead of us. I managed to get here from Detroit and run downtown to the Spanish Consulate this morning to get my "working papers." I also have my bicycle in tow. That will be so nice to have in Málaga! And my CDs! I am looking forward to finding an apartment, but I'm anxiety-ridden about the job. So much to do. Pressure. It's always there. Frustration, too. But, I need to go for it! Just Do It! I will succeed! It will be fantastic! Jenny is pretty sure of coming in October. Alyssa wants to come, too. I talked to Bob last night. He's still thinking about it, but didn't sound overly positive. So I continue on - alone. One day at a time. Enjoying the ride. The experiences! I've spent too much money these past two weeks. $1000 on the flight. $200 on clothes. $100 on books. Probably another $100 on other stuff. Oh, $250 on a CD player and CDs. The check for $9000 from my dad's estate has shrunk fast. So I'm not as rich as I had hoped. I hope I can make $2000 - $2500 a month at work. That'd be nice. Mitchell might pick me up at the airport in Málaga. Otherwise, it'll be a major pain to transport my stuff. Sabena Airlines has the worst music selection on the headsets!

(Wednesday) 3:00 pm 17 June 1992

Oh, the dreaded lay-over in Montreal. It was snowing when I was here 4 1/2 months ago. Almost made it! Only 2 hours left! Elizabeth is picking me up at the airport. I've been talking to a woman from Ann Arbor sitting next to me. Talking politics, EC, Supreme Court. It's so nice meeting cool people. So much to look forward to these next weeks! I enjoyed wandering around London yesterday. Bought some books and CDs. Had dinner in Chinatown. I love London. Shame about the weather. Actually, it was nice yesterday. Better than Málaga's been. I'll be in the humidity of Detroit soon!

3:00 pm

Back in my beloved England. I do enjoy this place. It's so comforting for some reason. I love this train ride from Gatwick to London. The British countryside. The weather always a bit dreary. I talked to Keith this morning, but they were off to Cornwall, so I'll have to find a place to stay tonight. I remember a nice youth hostel right near Victoria Station. I'll try it. I can't wipe the smile off my face.

11:30 pm

Spending my last night in my home of the past four months. Feeling a bit melancholy. A lot of good times were had here. It seems so long ago.... Practicing Sevillanas in the living room, getting philosophical on the terrace, sleeping with Bob in the bedroom! But, God knows, I'm ready to get out of España for a while. Matt called and I told him how much I was looking forward to coming home. And how fed up I've been with the job. I can't believe how much I've been working. And the weather's been shitty. And I'm sick of speaking Spanish! I was talking to Mitchell this evening. He said he hopes I return. I said of course I will, but I need to get out for a while. We talked about how hard it is to leave friends and family. He convinced me to wait until 9:00 to get my check. Then I was supposed to meet Andrés at a private club. They let me in with my ripped jeans and camouflage backpack and I waited 20 minutes. Then I left. I hate Spaniards sometimes! It really didn't matter because I wasn't going to cash the check now anyway. It will be nice to have money when I return. So, tomorrow I go. I wish I didn't have to spend the night in London. I haven't been able to get ahold of Keith, either. Oh well. We'll see what happens. Another adventure awaits.